Rehabilitation
by BrittViolicious
Summary: LEMON one-shot set a few weeks after the events of D&G. Sookie is having a very hard time managing her pain, both mental and physical. Sensing her distress, Eric finally comes to her aide. Sookie POV. Caution: Angst, sap, and smut ahead.


**This is my first attempt at SVM fanfiction, and the first fic I've ever actually completed and published. Please review, review, review! This is a one-shot that I may or may not continue in the future.  
**

**Disclaimer: All characters are property of Charlaine Harris. I'm just borrowing them for a little while.**

I hurt. I hurt all over, all the time. It didn't matter what I was doing or what time of day it was or what pills I'd popped that day, the pain was always there. Sometimes I wondered if it was all in my head, considering it had been weeks since that time in the little house in Arkansas. Weeks since my body, and my mind, had battled against those claws and teeth and knives.

I tried to stay active, tried to distract myself. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw their toothy grins and heard their cackles. I felt like I was always just on the edge of a panic attack, even when I had that stupid smile plastered on my face. It was worse during the day, when I knew that all of the creatures who had tried so valiantly to protect me were either asleep or long gone. It didn't matter that Things One and Two were dead, or that the door to the Fae world had closed shortly thereafter. I was always waiting, just waiting to be taken back to that place. I knew when the second time came around that my life would be over before dusk, before they even had a chance to try to save me.

It was morbid, I know. I was just a morbid kind of girl these days. Some days were worse than others, and this was definitely one of them. It was a Tuesday, and I was working the afternoon shift at Merlotte's. I almost preferred to be there now, since Amelia and Octavia had both gone on their respective ways and left my house empty of the chatter and laughter that I had become accustomed to. At least when I was at work, the dozens of brains buzzing away helped to drown out my own thoughts. I still jumped at every dropped fork or slammed glass, but I preferred the noise to my empty house.

My leg was really bad today. The chunks of flesh that had been bitten out had somewhat filled in after Eric had given me his blood, but the tissue would never be what it once was. I heard the kitchen bell ding telling me my order was up, and I hobbled over to the window. I picked up the chicken basket and slowly made my way over to Halleigh Bellefleur's table. She was having an early dinner alone today, which made her unbearably chatty.

"Here you go, Halleigh," I said, plopping the basket in front of her with a bottle of ketchup. "Do you want another tea?"

"Oh, no, thanks, Sookie. I'll just have a glass of water." She smiled up at me. "I gotta start watching how much caffeine I drink, since I hear it's not good for the baby. Not that fried chicken is-"

"Ok, I'll get that to you right away!" I spun around on my heel and tried to walk as fast as I could manage to the drink dispenser. I know it's rude to interrupt and all, but I just couldn't take it today. Of course, I was happy for her, but there was only so much happiness I could tolerate.

I dropped her ice water off as quickly as I could, smiling at her even though she looked sideways at me with a pert look on her face. I limped by my other tables, making sure everyone had drinks and napkins and condiments. I had been on my feet for 5 hours already, and I was pushing it. When I made my perch back at the bar after all of my customers were tended to, Sam looked up at me with a knowing frown.

"Sook, you need to take it easy. It doesn't do you or me any good for you to work harder'n you ought to. I feel like I'm taking advantage."

"Psshh…" I glowered at him and waved my hand dismissively. "You know I like working hard, and it helps with the… Well, you know." I looked away and instinctively rubbed the spot on my lower left thigh that was proving especially irritated today. "Plus, I need the money since my roommates are gone."

"Then why don't you want to work the night shifts anymore? You know they're better tips… But now you always want to be here during the day." Sam crossed his arms on top of the bar and raised his eyebrow at me. "It's Eric, isn't it? You're spending all of your nights with him now, huh?"

I huffed at him and got out of my bar stool, more indignant than I had any right to be. "Dammit, Sam, give it up already! I am _not_ going to discuss any part of my real or imaginary love life with you. You know how well that's worked out for us before." I looked up to see Holly coming through the employee doors. "Holly's here, so I'm going home. There, you happy?"

I pulled my apron off and threw it at him, then went into Sam's office. Holly was putting her purse away and tying her apron on. She looked up and gave me a strange look. "What's your problem?"

Apparently I wasn't so good at hiding my emotions anymore.

I tried to smile at her. "Nothing, just a long day." I gave her the run-down of my tables, then grabbed my purse and headed out the door.

As I started to cross the parking lot, my pace slowed to accommodate my aching leg. I was about a quarter of the way to my car when I had to stop for a moment. I bent over and put my hands on my knees, closed my eyes, and then took a few deep breaths. The silence of the parking lot suddenly filled my ears. It was too late for the lunch crowd, but too early for the dinner crowd, so there was hardly any noise coming from the customer parking lot around the building. I opened my eyes and looked up to survey the parking lot. Holly had been dropped off, so there was only my car, Sam's old truck, and the minivan that belonged to the new waitress. For some Godforsaken reason, I had parked towards the back, near the line of trees behind the lot. For a second, all of the little crunchy noises and chirps that came from the woods silenced, and the hair on the back of my neck stood at attention.

The panic started in my toes, that creepy-crawly feeling that tells you you're alone and something could happen at any moment, and that you couldn't do a damn thing about it. My breathing began to quicken as I straightened up to look at the sky, realizing it was about a half hour before sunset. My heart started beating faster and faster, and I knew I had to make a run for it. Before I could think about it, I was sprinting toward my car, almost tripping as I tried to dig my keys out of my purse. _Stupid stupid stupid…_ was going through my head, but I didn't know if I meant I was stupid for being this panicked or stupid for not realizing my predicament sooner.

After what felt like half a mile, I finally reached my car door. I scratched the paint as I tried to shove the key in the lock, and then finally threw open the door. I jumped into the driver's seat, slammed the door behind me, and pushed the lock back down.

I threw my head back on the headrest and tried to catch my breath, and then suddenly I was crying, crying for my leg and my mind and my lost friends. I had gotten used to these moments, so I just rode it out. I sobbed and screamed at nothing in particular. I slammed my hands on the steering wheel, catching my damaged right wrist in the process.

"FUCK!" I seemed to be cursing a lot more these days. It just didn't seem so important to be proper and ladylike anymore.

I held my wrist to my chest and sobbed for a few more moments. The pain from my leg and various other body parts that had been strained in my attempt at athleticism began to seep in, and my sobs turned into shuddering sighs. I rubbed my hands over my face and put my forehead on the steering wheel for a few minutes, and then I decided my little tantrum was over. I pulled a bottle of water and a pill bottle out of my purse, popped open the top, and swallowed a few of the round little blue things. I couldn't have told you how many, exactly.

I don't know why the closeness of the car made me feel any safer. I knew, logically, that anything that really wanted to get me wouldn't be deterred by a little bit of metal and glass, but it didn't matter. Maybe I was becoming agoraphobic, I didn't really know or care.

I rubbed my leg absently the whole way home. I didn't turn on the radio. I didn't roll down my windows or turn on my A/C. I just stared at the road in front of me and went on autopilot. My mind drifted off to some faraway place, like I had prayed it would during those hours in the house in Arkansas. It was a cruel irony that it could do it now, when I didn't have a whole lot to escape from.

My fog lifted when I realized I was pulling up my driveway. I didn't park around back anymore. In fact, I avoided walking in that door at all costs. The few times I had, I had frozen in a fear that was hard to overcome by sheer willpower alone.

I sat in my car for a minute and stared at the dark windows of my house. I thought through all of the different ways someone could infiltrate them. This time the thoughts didn't scare me. I thought it was probably because of the pills, since my resolve obviously was still shot to hell.

I opened my car door and relished the crunch of the gravel under my tennis shoes. Simple things like this were my only pleasures now. I stood up and took a deep breath. The honeysuckle that I had planted around the front porch was blooming, and it smelled heavenly. I convinced myself that it had magical calming powers, which is why it was conveniently placed in the open space I had to cross to reach my front door.

I shuffled to the door, unlocked and opened it, and then peered into the darkening house. I flipped on the light switch, fully expecting something to be standing there in the middle of my living room. When there wasn't, I turned around and half closed the door, then opened it back up slightly to look up at the sky. Almost full dark now. Then I might be able to rest. Maybe.

I performed my new entering-the-house ritual. I turned on the light in every room, opened every closet door, looked behind all the shower curtains. I checked the doors and windows. I hadn't closed the upstairs back up when Amelia left for this very reason. Knowing that there was a part of the house where someone, something, could be lingering, just waiting… I couldn't do it.

When I was satisfied, I went back into the living room and carefully sat down on the sofa. I didn't have the energy to change out of my work clothes, so I just slid my feet out of my shoes and stretched my toes. I slowly laid down, then flipped the TV on, tried to find something brainless to watch, and pulled a blanket over my legs.

My body ached all over. I rubbed my upper arms and neck, and then held my hands on my stomach. The lingering teeth marks on that sensitive area still stung like a dozen bees were attacking my skin. I felt the tears gather in the corners of my eyes again, but then I shook my head and stared at the TV screen with purpose.

I was so tired of crying. Every day, there was at least one small moment where I couldn't contain it. Some days were completely lost to fits of uncontrollable sobbing, and others it was just a couple of gently falling tears during my daily routine.

I know, I seemed to be wallowing in my own misery. It was pathetic, but I figured I deserved it after what I had been through.

My eyes grew heavy, and I was suddenly afraid. I could feel myself being sucked down into the deep sleep of an aching, exhausted body and mind. I knew what happened in my dreams, but I couldn't stop my descent.

Then I was there, back in that room. Their eyes and teeth took up my entire range of vision, and I screamed silently. I felt the cold points against my skin, just dragging now, not hurting yet. I realized that my wrists weren't bound this time, but I couldn't seem to move. As the first bit of flesh began to give way, I was able to lift my arm. I sluggishly punched in the air at the eyes, but I couldn't make contact. Then my other arm felt freed, and as the first set of teeth sank into my leg, I tried to scratch wildly at the head of hair in my lap. But I couldn't. I barely lifted my arms and seemed to pet the head, no matter how fiercely I tried. The face rose up from my destroyed flesh and grinned at me, my blood streaming through the pointy teeth.

I screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed. Suddenly I felt hands on my shoulders, shaking me harder than they should.

"Sookie… Sookie!"

I felt a hand patting my face, cold fingers running over my cheek. Suddenly the bloody teeth in my vision turned to ice blue eyes.

"Sookie, can you see me? Please, wake up…"

I felt myself take in a sharp, ragged breath, and then it was over. I was lying on my sofa again, my hands in front of my face in a defensive position. Behind them was blonde hair and blue eyes, and I felt the familiar warmth rush around my body.

"Eric? Where… How… I…" A cool finger rested on my lips, and he gathered me up into his arms.

"Shhhh… It's ok, lover. You were having a nightmare." He rocked me gently, and I buried my face in his neck.

I suddenly realized something that my mind had not been recognizing in its haze… Eric had not been to see me since that night. It dawned on me that I hadn't let myself think of him, not really, in the past few weeks. When his name or past events involving him crossed my mind, they were completely emotionless.

I grew angrier by the second as these thoughts flashed through my mind. I leaned back so I could look into his face. My rage must have shown clearly, because he looked at me very curiously.

"Sookie… What's the matter? Sometimes I wish I could read your mind."

"What do you mean what's the matter?!" I spat at him. "After everything that I went through that night, you haven't been to see me… You haven't even called… What's the matter _with you_?"

He cocked an eyebrow at me. "Darling, I was only obeying your wishes… Don't you remember?"

I scoffed at him. "What are you talking about?"

He shifted so that I was sitting on the sofa next to him, and he turned to look straight into my face. "I would have been here every day to care for you… But the day after it happened… You really don't remember?" Eric looked into my eyes, and I shook my head incredulously. "You told me that all of your pain was because of us, the vampires, and that you only wanted to live a normal life… That you never wanted to see the likes of me or Bill or Pam or any of the supes again, and that you would rather die than be the wife of a vampire."

I continued to shake my head with conviction. "No… No, I wouldn't say any of that… You're making this all up."

He placed a cool hand on my cheek. "No, dear heart, I wish I was. I knew it was your pain talking, but I decided I would give you some space to cool your head, and you would come to me. That never happened." His hand dropped to my shoulder, and he looked sad for a moment. "After everything, I couldn't leave you be just because you asked me to, but I tried to make it appear that I did. Every spare moment I've had, I have been here, watching you, ensuring that you're safe. I stayed just out of range so you couldn't feel my presence through our bond. I was a little closer than usual tonight, and I felt your terror… I thought it was happening all over again, so that's why I came."

I looked down at my hands, which were resting on his leg. "Why don't I remember? Why would I say such awful things? I just realized that I haven't even thought about you, or that you weren't here, until now… Why? Did you glamour me somehow, or did someone put a spell on me, or... How?" My eyes must have been crazed, because Eric looked a little scared and sad for a moment.

"I can only assume it was because of the trauma. You must have blocked out things that would have made your situation even more painful."

"What, so I have... what is it... PTSD or something?" Thoughts of poor, shattered Terry Bellefleur flashed through my head, and I grew very afraid for my mind. I was used to being afraid for my body, but this was somewhat new.

Eric shook his head slightly and shrugged. "Only time will tell." He pulled me back into his strong arms. "But I am here now, and I won't leave your side until you have recovered. I swear."

I hid my face in his shoulder. "I don't think I'll ever be fully recovered, Eric. It's just too much. I can't deal with it." I felt the tears begin to well up again. "I'm always so scared... And the pain…" I whispered, closing my eyes tight.

Eric stroked my hair and put his lips to my ear. "Don't worry, my love, I will help you… You will overcome this."

In the strength of his arms, I felt like I could finally let go of everything I had been holding in for the past few weeks. I began sobbing violently, and I clung to him like a frightened child. I thought about everything that I had endured in the last two years, culminating in my torture. I thought about all of my friends that had died such horrible deaths. I mourned their lives and the pieces of mine that I had lost along the way. At that moment, I was so overcome with grief that I couldn't have spoken or walked if my life depended on it.

Before I realized what had happened, I felt myself being settled into my bed. Deft, cold fingers carefully pulled off my clothes and then covered me in a thick blanket. I felt him climb into my bed next to me and cradle me to him. I wasn't crying anymore, I was just staring… At nothing… At everything. My eyelids grew heavy and I drifted off to sleep.

It was the first time that I slept soundly since before it had happened. I didn't remember any of my dreams. All I could remember was the warmth, the peace. As my mind started to come to, my Word of the Day from last Wednesday popped into my head. Catharsis. How appropriate.

I woke up, rubbed my eyes, and looked up blurrily at the alarm clock. It was 1am. Although I had only slept a few hours, it felt like the best sleep I had had in months. Something stirred beside me, and I realized that Eric was still in bed with me.

His arm snaked around my waist, and his mouth found my ear. "Did you sleep well, lover?" he whispered.

I nodded and rolled over to face him. Although I felt mentally at peace, my body was still in turmoil. I winced as I caught a nasty scar on my hip.

Eric looked concernedly into my face. He was on his side, propped up on his elbow. Naked, might I add. "Where do you hurt?" His thumb came up to rub a long scar that started on the tip of my shoulder and ran along my clavicle.

"Everywhere." I closed my eyes again and lay my head on the pillow next to him.

Eric gently brushed the hair out of my face and tucked it behind my ear. Tentatively, he leaned down and brushed his lips to mine, almost questioning if I would accept his affections. I had never known Eric to be unsure of himself before, but it seemed that the last few weeks had taken its toll on both of us.

I brought my hand up to his face and returned his kiss. His fingers lightly stroked my side, starting at my hip and going all the way up to my shoulder. I wound my fingers into his hair and pulled him closer to me. This was all the encouragement he needed, and he wrapped his arm around my back and pulled me into his body. Our lips and tongues danced effortlessly. I started to lift my leg to wrap around his waist, but I hissed through my teeth as the muscles stretched painfully.

Eric pulled back and looked into my eyes tenderly. "Your pain is mine, and I am going to help you through it," he said, as he laid his hand on my thigh. He gently pushed me onto my back and hovered over me, kissing me so lightly that I began to ache for his touch. He leaned down and kissed my jawline, then went to the long scar he had been running his thumb over just a few moments before. He kissed and suckled every inch of it. Then he picked up my arm and kissed every puncture wound and scratch he could find, finally settling on my wrist. Once he was satisfied with that arm, he worked on the other, and then wandered down my torso. He kissed the scratch marks above my breasts, then barely nuzzled them as he worked his way down to my stomach. I could tell that he wanted me to know this wasn't supposed to be about sexual gratification, or about him claiming what was his. He simply wanted to comfort me, in his own way.

He spent what felt like an hour tending to my every wound and scar. The teeth marks on my stomach, the half-healed patches on my thighs, the puncture wounds on my back. I couldn't wrap my head around it, but every scar he kissed suddenly felt better than it had before. I simply lay there, rubbing my hands through his hair and down his back, reveling in his ministrations. The desire, the type that I never thought I would feel again, began to build within me. He was revisiting the wounds right below my bellybutton when I pulled his face up to look at me. His eyes burned with love and unadulterated passion. "Come here, lover," I whispered, and he slowly kissed his way back up my torso. This time, though, he did pause at my breasts, suckling my nipples until I was almost panting.

I let out a low groan as I arched my back into him. "Eric..." I whispered, trying not to beg as his talented fingers began to explore my wetness. He decided he had teased me enough, and he came up to meet my face. His fangs were extended, but he had been careful enough to not even let them graze my skin. I leaned up and kissed him passionately, digging my fingers into his back. I wrapped my legs around his waist, barely registering that the pain that had struck me before was almost gone. Without leaving my lips, Eric positioned himself at my entrance. I wrapped my fingers in his hair and whispered into his mouth. "Please..." He broke our kiss for a moment, and then slowly began to enter me. We looked deeply into eachother's eyes as he thrust into me. His lips found mine again as I arched my back against him, moaning softly.

He took his time tonight. There was no thrashing and clawing and fucking, as there had been before. Tonight, he made love to me. As he slowly worked my body, he again found every scar within his reach and caressed it with his lips. His sweetness touched me in a place that hadn't been reached in a long time, if ever. I felt the tears well up in the corners of my eyes again, but this time they were very different tears. Eric kissed the first wet streak down my cheek, and paused his rhythm. "Sookie, my love, what's wrong? Am I hurting you?"

I kissed his cheek and whispered in return, "No... For once, I'm not feeling any pain at all." I drew back and smiled through my tears, then pulled him down to kiss me. He began to rock against me gently, and I leaned up to put my mouth to his ear. "Eric... Please, promise me something. Never leave me again. Even if I tell you that I want you to die a thousand deaths in hell, never leave me... I don't think I could bear it."

Eric stopped again and pulled back to look at me questioningly. "If that is your wish, dear heart, then I promise to you, I will never leave your side... Unless I think you mean it, for once." He chuckled and leaned down to kiss and lick the tears off my face. The taste of one of my human fluids seemed to set off a spark in him, and he began to move against me again as he buried his face into my neck. He growled lightly as he thrust into me, deep and forceful, yet still in such a way that I knew he was being gentler than he wanted to be. I panted and moaned and dug my fingers into his back as he moved me closer and closer to orgasm. I clung to him wildly and kissed his neck and face and lips. I ran my hands over every inch of skin I could find. I wanted to feel every inch of him, I couldn't get enough. He was my new drug, what was bringing me back to myself, mind and body.

As his speed and intensity picked up, he licked and kissed his way across my neck, then whispered words I didn't understand into my ear. I felt his fangs brush against my neck, but he didn't bite. A fire began to burn in my abdomen, and I knew I had to have it. I tangled my fingers in his hair and tilted my head to the side. I pulled his head closer to me, but he still didn't take the final plunge. I whimpered, but he only kissed my jugular. "No, my love, you need all of your strength," he whispered huskily into my ear.

"Please... I need to feel it. I need to feel all of you. Please, Eric, please..." I moaned my desperation into his ear, and I knew I had won when I felt his rhythm falter. He groaned and then sank his fangs into my neck as he plunged into me as deeply as he could. A guttural sound came out of my throat and my head spun as I felt my blood flowing into him. "Yes... Yes... Make me feel alive again. I love you, Eric, I love you, I love you, I love you..." I chanted into his ear as he carefully drank from me. An orgasm crashed through my body, and I was left breathless as he slowed his strokes deep within me. His hands wound through my hair, and he began to lap at the small puncture wounds.

He licked his way back up to my ear, and whispered more words from an ancient language I didn't understand. "Sookie... My own dear heart, you are mine, and I am yours. I love you." My fingers traced his shoulders and neck, and I tried to imprint this moment into my memory.

Eric slowly withdrew from me, and I looked up at him questioningly, still in my post-orgasmic haze. "You're not done... Are you?"

He chuckled, that deep, sexy laugh that stirred my desire back up to a frenzy. "No, lover... Roll onto your side, with your back to me." I complied, and he pushed his length up against me. His lips found the sweet spot where my neck met my shoulder, and I shivered. He wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me back into him so that I could feel his hardness. I moaned and arched against him as he positioned himself to enter me once again. He ran his hands over my breasts and thrust into me, and I felt myself teeter on the edge of insanity.

As we found our rhythm again, moaning in unison, Eric brought his wrist up to my mouth. "You must drink, my love," he whispered into my ear. "I will heal you, even if it takes weeks, months, years." I hesitated, but I couldn't deny him. I took his wrist in my hand and dug my teeth into his skin. He gasped and thrust into me deeper and harder. His free arm snaked up from underneath me and wrapped around my waist, bringing me down hard against him. He placed his fangs on my shoulder and moaned, but did not bite, as I drank. I could feel his warm blood flooding my mouth, rushing immediately through my veins. I forgot about the horror that I had endured and simply lived in this moment, with him.

After a minute of me suckling his wrist, his pace and his moans grew quicker, and I writhed against him in return. I released his wrist from my mouth as the wound closed and threw my head back against his shoulder. He couldn't resist and sank his teeth into my neck again as we came together, orgasms rippling through our bodies. As we came back down to earth, his hand ran down between my breasts and settled on my stomach. He kissed and licked my neck as I lay in his arms, completely breathless, surrendered to his love.

I began to regain my breath, and Eric withdrew from me so I could roll over to face him. He looked lovingly into my eyes for a long moment, then kissed me tenderly for what felt like hours. "I hope you meant what you said," he breathed against my lips.

I smiled and kissed him again. "Every word." I knew then that he was my savior, my way back into myself. My mind and body felt a calm that I hadn't experienced in quite a while. He would be my healer, my facilitator, my lover. "I love you, Eric."

He didn't have to say it in return. He only had to exist in that moment, to kiss me, to stroke my hair, for me to know that he reciprocated every feeling that I had. I knew he would give his very life for me if I asked him to. Of course, that would be counterproductive.

We lay there, limbs entwined, until the dawn approached. Eric suddenly looked up at me in apprehension. He lifted a finger to trace my cheek bones, my brow, my lips. "I swore to you that I would never leave your side. Yet, here I am, forced to leave it. I will forever despise the sun."

I leaned over and kissed him lightly, lingeringly. "You don't have to be with me physically for me to know that you are with me. We are a part of eachother now, always and forever."

"Forever..." Eric stared into my eyes, almost forlorn. "Forever is a long time, dear heart. After my long life, you would think I would be accustomed to the idea. But now that I have known you, I don't know if I could face a forever without you in it." He began to trace my scars with his fingers again, reminders of my fragile mortality.

I grabbed his hand in mine and held it to my lips. "We will just have to see what happens, my love. I am here with you now." After my very close brush with death, the thought of being changed into a nearly immortal creature was becoming slightly more appealing. I don't know how I would fare as a vampire, but I knew that I wanted to live, and I wanted to live with _him_ for as long as possible.

Eric kissed me once more, long and deep and loving. He then brought his lips up to my forehead. "Goodnight, lover. Thank you for coming back to me." I closed my eyes and drank in his touch for a long moment, and then he was gone.

I lay how he left me for a while, the events of the night drifting through my head as my eyelids grew heavy. I pulled the blanket tight around me, then glanced out the window. The sun was peaking out over the horizon. Even though I knew my protector was now hidden in the floor of my spare bedroom closet, unable to reach me if I needed him, I was at peace. I stretched out under the covers, and it suddenly dawned on me that I was almost painless. There was still a slight ache in my leg, and a tingle on my stomach, but it was a fraction of what it had been 12 hours before. Happy tears sprang to my eyes, and I quickly dashed them away. "No more tears," I told the empty room.

I rolled onto my side and snuggled against the pillow Eric had been using. I breathed in his scent as I drifted off to sleep. For the first time in weeks, I slept quietly and dreamed happy dreams, even though I was alone in my bed. But I knew I would never truly be alone again.


End file.
